a recovering nice guy...

I got this off my bestest buddy's blog, abochan...i thought it's a great way to start my input for 2008...although we're coming to the end of it...sigh, sienz...

"What Happened to All the Nice Guys?"
I see this question posted with some regularity in the personals section, so I thought I'd take a minute to explain things to the ladies out there that haven't figured it out. What happened to all the nice guys? The answer is simple: you did. See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were fucking treated you.

At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends". Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.

Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"

Well, once again, you did. You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-friend". Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an asshole than he ever wanted to be. Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that.

And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that. So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:

1. Build a time machine.
2. Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3. Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.

I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you. If you were five years younger, please: either stop misrepresenting what you want, or own up to the fact that you've fucked yourself over. You're getting older, after all. It's time to excise the bullshit and deal with reality. You didn't want a nice guy then, and he certainly doesn't fucking want you, now.

Sincerely,
A Recovering Nice Guy

energy energy energy

for the past two weeks i've been sweating it out. attended numerous energy classes in hope to shed some pounds in time to put them back on again during chinese new year. bakerong!

battle of the dogs

upward dogs and downward dogs are two very distinct poses in yoga. be it during sun salutations or you can use it as a relaxation pose.

life is exactly just like that, upwards and downwards...however, if one is to always focus on downwards, they are subconciously inviting the the downside to life. for me, i prefer to look at the upward of things. be it positive or negative, always good to turn things positive.

indeed, downward dogs can be relaxing but upward dogs helps to build upper body strength too...so, should i relax or should i build strength?

10 best lines to dump someone

1. it's best to be friends
2. maybe we're seeing each other too much
3. sorry, i'm too busy
4. i need to make time for my friends
5. i'm too tired
6. nothing much...really!
7. it's ok, doesn't matter anymore
8. i really don't know
9. i want some of 'my' space
10. let's just move on

for any of the above, prescription poses include the beautiful sun salutation both series a and series b, then try head stand.....to flush the head with more blood so that you stay sane.

namaste

i'm such a fool

i can be such a fool sometimes
falling into pits of slimes
what should i do?
i'm such a fool

i wish i did too...

the following is written by someone whom i care for very much. and i'll leave the rest to your beautiful imagination.

I wish I did -

Your hands
they soothed over my belly,
traversing both down to my waist,
curving my hips,
slowly, lathering my skin,
twas strong yet gentle.

Your finger
A map has been secretly drawn,
All over my quivering naked body.
You have given me your secret.
It is the journey,to the path of your heart.
Where within lies the jewel,
the treasure which I must find.

Your strong arms
came without a sound,
lifted me up gently.
(I never thought you could!)
I was scared at first,
but I clutched onto your body tightly,
I closed my eyes and
I trusted you.
You didn’t say anything.
I hung on to you steadfastly,
like how a baby would do.

A rush of blush!
And a few utter of mindless words
into the careless air...
While we joined hands in unison.
Our hands.

I was to endure a path
Of abominating exposure.
But it’s okay,
We’re all alone.
I’m not shy this time.

How do you describe this feeling?
How can you exactly do that?
Speechless and unable to move,
Time stood still in the room.
All we were left was each other

.................................

The outside world is unaware of us.
So hush, my dear... be quiet for us.

It’s 6am, and I’m awake.
And you're still sleeping.
Outside the world is still grayish,
But lying in bed with you now,
Locked in your arms feels so safe.

I’m peeping at you with semi-closed eyes,
while you were sleeping.
I’m like playing a hide and seek game.
Without you knowing I’m watching.
I’m wondering what you are dreaming about.
You look so peaceful and calm.
I just didn’t want to disturb you
With my sudden movements
Even when I was shivering without a blanket,
I just held onto you more tightly,
Hoping your body can make mine warmer.

You like to hug me when you sleep,
even in your dreams.
you still keep your arms around me as always
It’s as though you’re afraid
I wouldn’t be there anymore when you wake up.

(Hidden Piece)
Our face is so close,
And I can quickly steal a kiss from you
without your knowing
Should I do it?
well...
muaks!
There, I did it. I stole a kiss.
I’m a good thief, aren’t I?
I’m wondering,,Did I pilfered your heart too?
I wish I did,
I wish I did

..........................................

As traces of your scent still wafts,
Where your hands passed.
On my crisp blue shirt to work that morning,
(My darling, do you remember? you were really there
with me the whole day)
In my hair,
On my fingers,
On parts of my skin,
It all smells of you.

Baby,
This time I can’t wait for tonight.
I want you to hold me in your arms,
I want to know if holding you back,
Lying in your warm embrace again,
Feels as real, as it does in my constant dream.

And,
It really is you.

and again... and again...
and again...
and again..

Harvin.14/8/7
This piece etched like a tatoo in my heart.

my wants

this week has been hectic. no time for my practise and very minimal time to juggle my personal time as well. is it all worth it? honestly, i'm not too sure about it. but if i don't strive for it now...i won't want to strive for it in 10 years times. it's now or never.

i want my practise to continue, i want my teachings to go on, i want to earn big, i want a life...i have one!

i'm grateful for my job, i'm grateful for the opportunity given in my practise, i thank god for the good health he's graciously given to me and i thank him for my wonderful family and friends. hugs all!

namaste.

yama niyama...not tiu nia ma lar!

i just got dropped from one outlet because some indian teacher whom they employed insisted on my slot. so, go ahead take my slot. no worries.

shouldn't yoga be part of the yama niyama chain? why are they fighting against each other? weird.

remaining 5 classes per week now. not too bad. let's see how it goes.

namaste.